Haiku: Zodiac

I was trying to log in to my Amazon Prime account so I could stream the Thursday night football game. I couldn’t remember my password, so I had to walk down to a neighborhood bar to catch the game.

It was one of those rainy autumn nights that reminds you Winter is in the mail – express delivery, no doubt. I got a Scotch and a basket of fries to fortify me for what was supposed to be a highly contested mid-season showdown between two football powerhouses.

But, by half time, the game had turned into a horribly one-sided affair and I had all but lost interest. Then, something unexpected happened. An attractive woman sat down next to me and said, “Not much of a game, is it?”

“No, I guess not,” I said.

“So, it looks like I got stood up tonight. I don’t recommend internet dating sites.”

“Sorry to hear,” I said. “It’s their loss, though,” I added.

“Well, he’s an Aries. They’re just flaky by nature. What are you?”

I didn’t quite follow the question, but after a moment, I realized she wanted to know my Zodiac sign. “Um, Capricorn,” I finally stammered.

“Oh, too bad,” she said. “I’m a Libra. It would never work. Well, enjoy your night,” she said.


After she paid her tab and walked out, the bartender set another Scotch in front of me and said, “This one’s on the lady who just left. What’s her story, anyway?”

“She’s a Libra,” I informed him.

“Oh,” he said.

I sipped my Scotch and thought about Astrology. I thought it’s strange that even now, in the 21st century, so many people consider Astrology to be a pillar of reality. Then I thought about how strange my notions of reality must be to other people. I believe in the feasibility of String Theory, and therefore, I believe there must be extra spatial dimensions beyond the three typical ones. Crazy, huh?

I decided everyone should be allowed to choose which philosophy they subscribe to, free of judgement. And to show I was really serious, I wrote the following haiku on a bar napkin as a tribute to Astrology.




the days bleed into

cold obsidian fathoms

where stars forge our fates

4 thoughts on “Haiku: Zodiac”

  1. Hawk, a great haiku! Also, I liked your remarks about astrology. I studied it many years ago, and found it interesting and fun as a personality assessment tool (more colourful than Myers Briggs!) – but like anything else, it has to be done right. Even then. The woman you met was going by sun sign only – there’s so much more to a chart. If she really truly was into serious astrology, she would have made no surface assessments – she’d need to see your chart and compare it to hers for compatibility. Clearly she’s just a surface astrologer. 😀✨

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  2. That seems like a more reasonable approach to astrology. I like to think I can get along with any rational person. Maybe I’ll get my chart done one day. There’s a place up the street that deals in such matters.

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  3. Here are two free online sites to get some natal chart (birth chart) info – you will be able to see the actual horoscope wheel as well as getting the basic information about your planets, houses, aspects, etc. They will want to charge you for more in depth material but you can try your local down the street place for that. This will just give you a start. Enjoy! (If you try it and have questions, feel free to run them/the chart by me – maybe I can offer some intuitive input!)

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